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Posted by Leafy Green
on April 22, 2008 10:42 AM
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Filed Under: Humour, Transportation |
Believe it or not, there are so-called advocacy groups out there calling for SUV's to be down-sized or even discontinued. This is serious. And I, as proud owner of an F-150 pickup, would strap myself to my windshield with dynamite taped to my chest, before I let the National Coalition of Hugo-driving Salad-eaters take my truck away. I enjoy being the biggest, baddest vehicle on the block, and if you can't see around my bumper in rush hour, then eat exhaust, buddy, or--if you feel real lucky--try road-raging my keester off the boulevard.
This is the kind of insight you'll find over at Net Monster in their Blather article on investigating the mentality of an SUV driver. If you're an SUV driver, can you relate to the quote above? Is the ego-boost alone worth driving an unnecessarily wasteful vehicle?
How about this:
"I want to drive a tank," Barbara T. says without shame. "I want my kids to learn to drive in a tank."... While an all-wheel-drive Subaru Legacy might do the job, Barbara says,"I wouldn't be caught dead driving a station wagon."
Even though a station wagon or minivan might be a more practical choice, does the social status of driving a big tank of a truck justify the 7,000 pound behemoth in your driveway?
Or how about this:
The fact is there is a responsible case to be made for driving SUVs. It can be summed up in three words: "This is America."
Americans like things big. Ours is a big country with a big-hearted people full of big dreams. The love of bigness, whether we are talking buildings, bosoms, meals or vehicles, is as American as apple pie.
It may be natural for your English persons or Italians to squeeze themselves into Mini-Minors or toy-sized Fiats, but an American in his own land must have room to expand behind the wheel if he or she is to visit giant shopping malls and stop for lunch at large all-you-can-eat buffets.
Is that what it really boils down to? We can bitch about China burning coal but over here... well dammit we're Americans so we have the right to supersize everything, even our carbon footprints!
Tongue is in cheek here in case you didn't notice. You're not a bad person for driving an SUV any more than your neighbor is a bad person for throwing recyclables in the trash. But we all have to do our part. If automakers won't stop making SUVs and insecure people won't stop buying them than the government should tax the living sh*t out of the manufacturers, the sellers and the drivers and put that money towards alternative energy programs. At least then the popularity of SUVs might help the planet a little bit.
» Net Monster