You may recall our post last month regarding Australia's decision to change Santa’s traditional ho-ho-ho to a more politically friendly greeting of ha-ha-ha. Now one department store has taken the fight one step further, firing a 70-year old Santa Claus for having the sheer nerve to utter his trademark phrase and then having the gall to sing Jingle Bells. John Oakes, the offending St. Nick, is a retired entertainer who has donned a red suit and white beard for three years.

"They're trying to kill the spirit of Christmas," said Oakes

Presumably, the dismissal occurred after little Susie went crying to her mommy because she mistakenly interpreted Santa’s jolly laugh as an insult calling her a two-bit whore. You know those sensitive four-year olds, always on top of the pop-culture phraseology game.

Merry Christmas indeed.

» Reuters